you're finding yourself at a crossroad, aren't you? what it ultimately all comes down to is that you've not really been making decisions, you've let something decide for you - whether it's fate or someone else or the outcome of a standard practice. i get it. life's overwhelming. when repeated enough times, little moments (the first step out of your bed, the clicking of the lightswitch, the passing of a song) blur into one big shape and you don't really know how to escape it. and doing nothing is easier than trying and failing. so, let me tell you something: when everything's hard, when you're struggling to stay awake, when it's getting increasingly more difficult to differentiate between the sun rising and the sun sinking, start untangling by noticing the little moments and making the small decisions. what foot's going first when you take a step? what color should your bowl be when you have your cereal? do you open the blinds at night to look at the sky for a moment, or do you leave them shut instead? you're at a crossroad, and the choice is up to you, and there is no wrong decision as long as you make one.